Teej Festival

Teej Festival


Teej festival is celebrated with great enthusiasm and devotion by the women in India. Since Teej fall at the outbreak of the monsoons, it is also popularly known as the 'Sawan Festival'. Teej is usually celebrated in the month of July-August. Festival of Teej is dedicated to the divine couple - Lord Shiva and Goddess Parvati. Though Teej is celebrated at various places in India and abroad, major Teej celebrations takes place in the highly cultural city of Jaipur. Here day-long processions and celebrations create a vivid atmosphere.

The three types of Teej Festival are:
Hariyali Teej: Hariyali Teej falls in the Shukla Paksha of Shravana. On this day, women worship moon with milk, curd and flowers.

Kajari Teej: It falls on Krishna Paksh Tritiiya. On this day, women sing and dance and perform sacred pooja of neem.

Hartalika Teej: Hartalika Teej falls on the third day of the first fortnight of the month of 'Bhadra'. At the time of Hartalika Teej, women keep 'Nirjala Vrat' for well - being of her husband.

Importance of Teej Festival
Teej festival is an important festival. Two very vital factors govern its celebration. One is that it is a monsoon festival and the other relates to the most popular legend of Shiva-Parvati.

Legend of Teej
According to Hindu mythology, in the month of Shravan, Goddess Parvati reunited with Lord Shiva after a penance of hundred years. In her 108th birth, Lord Shiva realized her devotion for him and accepted her as his wife. This legend is said to be the basis of Teej celebrations.
Click here to read more about Legends of Teej

Sawan Festival
Teej Festival heralds the beginning of monsoon season. It is celebrated in the month of Shravan which brings a great relief from the scorching heat of summers. Teej has special importance in the state of Rajasthan as it is celebrated in the rainy season which transforms the dry-parched lands of Rajasthan totally green. Teej becomes more auspicious and special if it rains on this day. With the arrival of monsoon, peacocks come out to dance while women enjoy themselves by swinging and dancing in the rain.

Teej Rituals
At the time of Teej, certain rituals and customs are followed by women so as to be blessed by Goddess Parvati. Married women return back to their parents house to celebrate the festival of Teej. It is considered very auspicious for married and engaged women to receive Teej gifts from their parents-in-law and to be parents-in-law. Future in-laws of engaged girls gift them 'Shrinjhara' (a gift pack) which consists of henna, lac bangles, a special laheria dress and ghewar (a sweet dish). Other gifts are also received by women from their relatives and in-laws.
Click here to read more about Teej Rituals

Ritual of Teej Henna
Applying henna to one's hands and feet is a special and most beautiful tradition of Teej. Special Mehndi designs are applied to match the mood of the festival. Women can be seen in the markets getting their palms decorated with henna. It is said, "the darker the henna, the more a woman is loved by her husband and in-laws". Sometimes, women also hide name of their husband in the mehndi design which later becomes part of the search game. Husbands search out their name and gift something to their beloved wife.

Tradition of Adorning Oneself
Women wear colorful clothes and gold-diamond jewelry to look like a new bride at the time of Teej. Some women even visit beauty parlors to look different on the special occasion of Teej. Many women especially the newly weds wear their wedding dress on the day. Most prominent colors of Teej are red, pink and green.
Click here to read more about Teej Shringar

Tradition of Vat Vriksha
Another important ritual is to worship Nyagrodha tree or Vat Vriksha. The tree is considered highly auspicious with its hanging branches reflecting knowledge. Women tie swings to the Vat Vriksha and dance while enjoying the showers of rain.

Tradition of Teej Fasting
Charmingly decorated idol of Goddess Parvati is kept at the center of the place where women gather to offer Teej prayers. Different Teej songs are sung praising Lord Shiva and Goddess Parvati. Women dance merrily on various Teej and sawan songs and enjoy the festive mood.
Click here to read more about Teej Mata

Teej Celebrations
Teej is celebrated with extreme joy and craze in Rajasthan. Many tourists flock the princely state to be part of Teej celebrations. A few days before the festival, the image of Goddess Parvati is repainted and beautifully decorated with fine clothes and jewelry. Idol of Teej Mata is taken out in the special Teej procession. Thousands of devotees wait on streets for hours to have a glimpse of Parvati Ma.

Number of artists like folk singers, dancers and other performers follow the Teej procession and becomes the main attraction. Apart from this, there are caparisoned elephants, bullock carts, and chariots.


Significance of Teej

Rooted deep in Indian religious and cultural ethos - Teej plays a significant role in defining the true nature of relationship between a married couple. Besides, the festival provides much needed break to womenfolk from their daily household drudgery. Find out how Teej is significant in these and more ways to the women in India.

Religious Significance of Teej
Religious significance of Teej festival lies in devotion of Goddess Parvati for her husband Lord Shiva. It was on this day that the divine couple Lord Shiva and Goddess Parvati reunited with each other after hundreds of years. Even today womenfolk commemorate this mythological event by observing 'Nirjara Vrat' for the well-being and long-life of their husband.

Climatic Significance
Teej celebrates the advent of monsoon season. Teej coincides with monsoon season and thus create a greater impact for its celebration. Taking full advantage of the beautiful climate at this time women enjoy themselves by swinging, singing and dancing in rain.

Break from Daily Humdrum of Life
Teej celebration has great significance for womenfolk as it gives them their much needed break from the daily humdrum of life. For married women it also brings a chance to visit their parents house and relive childhood memories. No wonder, women celebrate the festival with great mirth and enthusiasm. They pay special attention to their appearance and deck themselves in beautiful clothes and fine jewelry. Women also apply intricate patterns of mehndi on their hands and feet.

Strengthening Relationships
One of the foremost significance of Teej is that it helps in strengthening relationship between married couples. Women who observe fast for the long life of their husband in earnest devotion feel closer and more committed to their husband. While watching their wife straining themselves, husbands feel more special. They reciprocate by being more loving and caring towards their wife. Husbands usually express themselves by presenting gifts to their wife and being more sensitive towards their doting wives.

Legends Behind Teej

Teej is a major festival of women. It is celebrated every year in the month of July-August with great enthusiasm and verve. Festival of Teej dedicates the day's celebration to Goddess Parvati. The festival's theme is the devotion of women towards their husbands or to-be-husbands. Married and unmarried women adorn themselves to their best and pray for long life of their husband. Though Teej celebrates the advent of monsoon but there is a legend associated with it which makes the day more auspicious.

One of the most popular legend of Goddess Parvati led to Teej celebrations and women's devotion towards their husband.

Legend of Goddess Parvati
Teej celebrations originated from an age-old legend of Goddess Parvati. Hindu mythology states that Goddess Parvati reunited with Lord Shiva on this day. She went through hard-core tapasya or penance and took 108 births on the earth. The myth also states that she failed to have Lord Shiva as her husband till 107th birth. In her 108th birth, Lord Shiva realized her devotion and love for him and accepted as his wife.

It is said Goddess Parvati declared this moment to be highly auspicious for womenfolk and proclaimed that whoever invokes her on this day will be blessed with happy married life and whatever one desires. Women observe nirjala vrat and spend sleepless nights during the three day festival. This is symbolic to the penance which Goddess Parvati went through.

At the time of Teej, women dress up like a newly wed. They wear green, red and yellow attires, decorate their hands and feet with fascinating mehndi designs and sing devotional songs on Goddess Parvati and Lord Shiva. Women express their happiness, thank and pray God for marital bliss.

Kajli Teej Vrat Katha

To celebrate the auspicious occasion of Teej, women fast for longevity and healthy of their husband. They refrain themselves from water and food whole day and perform various rituals associated with the festival. In the evening a special Vrat (fast) katha is chanted. These are stories based on Hindu legends which are narrated to ladies who gather to conclude their fast ceremony. Teej Vrat Katha is very crucial feature of Teej celebrations.

Teej Fast

The holy custom of fasting form an integral part of Teej celebrations. Hence Teej is also famous as 'women fasting festival'. For full 24 hours women refrain themselves from food and water to ensure long life of their husband. The tradition to fast for so long without water and food has a pious legend associated with it. According to Hindu mythology, Goddess Parvati underwent penance for 100 years to be accepted by Lord Shiva. Even till date women pay homage to Goddess Parvati and seek blessings for blissful marital life.

Teej fast is widely popular in Northern as well as North-West region. Tradition of Teej fasting is obligatory for women belonging to Kayastha community.

Pre-Fasting Day of Teej
Teej fast is 24 hour-long and begins immediately after the first day of Teej. It is a pre-fasting day on which ladies gather to sing and dance. Mothers, grandmothers, sisters and daughters sit together to have a lavish feast because the rigorous fast begins at midnight. Married women keep fast for healthy life of their husband while unmarried girls keep it to marry a person who good and understanding. Women dress up in red colored clothes as it is associated with Hindu married women. One can see this holy scene every year as devotional women prepare themselves to undertake a day-long fast and prayers only for their husband.

Teej Fast – An Arduous One
Teej fast is a difficult one as women restrict themselves even from a morsel of food and drop of water for full 24 hours. Many women face health problems because of this.

It is especially very difficult for the newly wed women to keep the 24-hour-long fast without eating and drinking anything. One needs lot of patience and courage to keep such a long fast. Usually mother-in-law encourages their sweet bahus to drink juice or tea so that they don't fall sick on such an auspicious occasion.

Pregnant ladies are advised not to keep the fast and even if they observe the fast it is advisable to consult a doctor. Many pregnant ladies go on a diet of milk and fruits and fulfill their nutritional requirements.

To pass away the arduous day women also play a lot of games, watch movies and do many other activities to pass their time. Some even go off to sleep and don't involve themselves in any household activity.

After the day-long fast for longevity of their soul mate is over, women drink water and eat some healthy food. Many husbands make their wife drink water with their hands.

Our National Anthem

Hi Friends,

I am writing this post to just clear some myth about Our National Anthem:

Today i read one article.Here is some part of it:

" Our National Anthem "Jana Gana Mana" is sung throughout the country. Did you know the following about our national anthem? I didn't. I have always wondered who is the "adhinayak" and "bharat bhagyavidhata",whose praise we are singing. I thought it might be God!

To begin with, India's national anthem, Jana Gana Mana adhinayaka, was written by Rabindranath Tagore in honor of King George V and the Queen of England when they visited India in 1919. To honor their visit Pundit Motilal Nehru had the five stanzas included,which are in praise of the King and Queen. (And most of us think it is in the praise of our great motherland!!!)

In the original Bengali verses only those provinces that were under British rule, i.e. Punjab, Sindh,Gujarat,Maratha.. etc. were mentioned. None of the princely states were recognized which are integral parts of India now - Kashmir,Rajasthan,Andhra, Mysore or Kerala. Neither the Indian Ocean nor the Arabian Sea was included, since they were directly under Portuguese rule at that time.



The Jana Gana Mana Adhinayaka implies that King George V is the lord of the masses and Bharata Bhagya Vidhata is "the bestower of good fortune". Following is a translation of the five stanzas which glorify the King:

1st stanza - (Indian) People wake up remembering your good name and ask for your blessings and they sing your glories.

2nd stanza - around your throne people of all religions come and give their love and anxiously wait to hear your kind words.

3rd stanza - Praise to the King for being the charioteer, for leading the ancient travellers beyond misery.

4th stanza - Drowned in the deep ignorance and suffering, poverty stricken,unconscious country? Waiting for the wink of your eye and your mother's (the Queen's) true protection.

5th stanza - in your compassionate plans, the sleeping Bharat (India)will wake up. We bow down to your feet O' Queen, and glory to Rajeshwara (the King). This whole poem does not indicate any love for the Motherland but depicts a bleak picture. When you sing Jana Gana Mana Adhinayaka, whom are you glorifying? Certainly not the Motherland. Is it God? The poem does not indicate that. It is time now to understand the original purpose and the implication of this, rather than blindly sing as
has been done the past fifty years.

Nehru chose the present national anthem as opposed to Vande Mataram because he thought that it would be easier for the band to play. It was an absurd reason but today for that matter bands have advanced and they can very well play any music. So they can as well play Vande Mataram, which is a far better composition in praise of our dear Motherland -India.

Wake up, it's high time! Vande Mataram should be our National Anthem. "....



I don't know why people write this kind of blogs without knowing fact.


My Explanation:


Who is this “Bhagya Vidhata”?

Those of you who have read Tagore’s poetry and lyrics on “devotion” (Gitanjali for example) will know that if there was a divine entity to whom Tagore addressed many of his heartfelt yearnings for communion, it was a “Monarch” infinitely greater than any mortal King Emperor could ever aspire to be.
The Lord of India’s Destiny, to whom Jana Gana Mana is officially addressed, is in Tagore’s conception the perennial Bhagya Vidhata of India who has, from the very dawn of civilization, guided India through great triumphs and tragedies. The Lord of India in Tagore’s conception is therefore India’s “eternal guiding spirit” (a totally secular idea) and could never be merely the king of a colonial empire!
The charge that Jana Gana Mana was composed for George V actually rests on false evidence given by the pro-British press. The song was first sung in a session of the Congress in 1911. This session had decided to felicitate George V since he had announced the abrogation of the partition of Bengal, thereby conceding the success of the Swadeshi agitation, the first modern anti-colonial movement that had started in 1905. The day after the session the nationalist Indian papers normally — and accurately — reported that a Tagore composition had been sung. The Bengalee — along with other Indian newspapers as well as the report of the Indian National Congress – reported that it was a “patriotic song”. The following year the song was published as “Bharat — Vidatha”. A contemporary commentator in the vernacular Bharati described the song as one in “Praise of the Dispenser of human Destiny, who appears in every age.” He probably came closest to capturing its spirit. This song was to later become known as Jana Gana Mana.

Anyone who knows Bengali and who has read the COMPLETE song Jana Gana
Mana would realise that it is a canard that Jana Gana was written to
praise King George. In one of the later stanzas the poet refers to
"snehamoyi tumi MATA"(O affectionate MOTHER). King George could not
have been referred to as a MOTHER! It is also ironic that Hindutwavadis
are trying to promote Vande Mataram for this song was written with the
Bengali nation in mind. The later part of the poem referes to "Sapta
koti kantha" (Seven crore voices) which does not make sense as a
reference to India's population but makes perfect sense as a population
of Bengal in that time.

If you research more about our national anthem, you find that Tagore wrote the poem with God and India in mind. He was forced to write it for the British, but they could not force Tagore to think about King George when he wrote it.
Plus, only the first stanza is used in our national anthem.
Oh
and I’m pretty sure the Indian Government KNEW this when they picked out the National Anthem. They obviously did not pick out the poem to glorify the British, they had just derived the Brits out of their own country! I researched the topic and the reason they didn't pick Vande Mataram is because that poem has religious meaning and it wouldn't be fair to the Muslim leaders in India to have a religious national anthem. being a demo


"This song is in soul of Indian......"....
And we accept "Jana gan Mana"..

As our National Anthem.....!!!!.....JAI HIND

Swine Flu..take care My Friends!!...

Swine flu is a Type A influenza virus which causes regular outbreaks of flu in pigs, but is rarely fatal. In the past. swine flu has not normally affected humans, although there have been a few cases reported in people with direct exposure to pigs or in those who have been near pigs. From December 2005 to February 2009, the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention reported 12 cases of human infection with swine flu.

In late April 2009, the outbreak of more than a thousand cases of swine flu in humans in Mexico, and a suspected 86 deaths, as well as another 11 cases confirmed in the United States, led the World Health Organization to say that the outbreak has "pandemic potential" and to urge all countries to increase their reporting and surveillance of influenza and to be on high alert for any unusual patterns.

On April 26, 2009, six cases of swine flu in humans were reported in Canada - four in students in Nova Scotia, and two in British Columbia. The six cases were all very mild. By April 29, the number of cases had risen to 19, with health officials predicting more to come.

Symptoms of Swine Flu

The symptoms of swine flu are usually like those of regular seasonal flu and include:

1. headache
2. chills
3. cough
4. fever
5. loss of appetite
6. aches
7. fatigue
8. runny nose
9. sneezing
10. watery eyes
11. throat irritation
12. nausea and vomiting
13. diarrhea
14. in people with chronic conditions, pneumonia may develop

Precautions Against Swine Flu

Good standard flu prevention techniques are recommended to protect yourself against swine flu:

• Get a regular seasonal flu vaccination. It might not help against this specific strain, but it won't hurt.

• Wash your hands frequently with soap and hot running water. If hot water is not available, use an alcohol-based hand gel.

• When you cough and sneeze, cover your mouth and nose. Wash your hands afterwards.

• Avoid being near others who might be sick.

• Stay home if you are sick, to avoid affecting others.

Precautions for Travellers

• Before you travel, find out what vaccines you will need and where to get them. Visit your family doctor or a travel health clinic at least six weeks before your departure date.

• If you get sick when you are travelling, seek medical assistance.

• If you are sick when you return , or have been near someone who is, you must tell a customs or quarantine office, who will decide if you need further medical assessment.

• If you get sick after you return , see a health care provider. Be sure to tell him/her the countries you visited, if you were sick while away and any medical care or treatment your received.

Last but not the least...Don't Panic..Just take precaution!!!.....

For My Friends...

Anytime You Need A Friend

If you're lonely And need a friend And troubles seem like They never end Just remember to keep the faith And love will be there to light the way Anytime you need a friend I will be here You'll never be alone again So don't you fear Even if you're miles away I'm by your side So don't you ever be lonely Love will make it alright When the shadows are closing in And your spirit diminishing Just remember you're not alone And love will be there To guide you home Anytime you need a friend I will be here You'll never be alone again So don't you fear Even if you're miles away I'm by your side So don't you ever be lonely Love will make it alright If you just believe in me I will love you endlessly Take my hand Take me into your heart I'll be there forever baby I won't let go I'll never let go Anytime you need a friend I will be here You'll never be alone again So don't you fear Even if you're miles away I'm by your side So don't you ever be lonely It's alright It's alright

Vande matram....

वन्दे मातरम्

सुजलां सुफलां मलयजशीतलाम्
शस्यशामलां मातरम् ।
शुभ्रज्योत्स्नापुलकितयामिनीं
फुल्लकुसुमितद्रुमदलशोभिनीं
सुहासिनीं सुमधुर भाषिणीं
सुखदां वरदां मातरम् ।। १ ।। वन्दे मातरम् ।
कोटि-कोटि-कण्ठ-कल-कल-निनाद-कराले
कोटि-कोटि-भुजैर्धृत-खरकरवाले,
अबला केन मा एत बले ।
बहुबलधारिणीं नमामि तारिणीं
रिपुदलवारिणीं मातरम् ।। २ ।। वन्दे मातरम् ।
तुमि विद्या, तुमि धर्म
तुमि हृदि, तुमि मर्म
त्वं हि प्राणा: शरीरे
बाहुते तुमि मा शक्ति,
हृदये तुमि मा भक्ति,
तोमारई प्रतिमा गडि
मन्दिरे-मन्दिरे मातरम् ।। ३ ।। वन्दे मातरम् ।
त्वं हि दुर्गा दशप्रहरणधारिणी
कमला कमलदलविहारिणी
वाणी विद्यादायिनी, नमामि त्वाम्
नमामि कमलां अमलां अतुलां
सुजलां सुफलां मातरम् ।। ४ ।। वन्दे मातरम् ।
श्यामलां सरलां सुस्मितां भूषितां
धरणीं भरणीं मातरम् ।। ५ ।। वन्दे मातरम् ।।

Translation by Shree Aurobindo
Mother, I bow to thee!
Rich with thy hurrying streams,
bright with orchard gleams,
Cool with thy winds of delight,
Dark fields waving Mother of might,
Mother free.

Glory of moonlight dreams,
Over thy branches and lordly streams,
Clad in thy blossoming trees,
Mother, giver of ease
Laughing low and sweet!
Mother I kiss thy feet,
Speaker sweet and low!
Mother, to thee I bow.

Who hath said thou art weak in thy lands
When the sword flesh out in the seventy million hands
And seventy million voices roar
Thy dreadful name from shore to shore?
With many strengths who art mighty and stored,
To thee I call Mother and Lord!
Though who savest, arise and save!
To her I cry who ever her foeman drove
Back from plain and Sea
And shook herself free.

Thou art wisdom, thou art law,
Thou art heart, our soul, our breath
Though art love divine, the awe
In our hearts that conquers death.
Thine the strength that nervs the arm,
Thine the beauty, thine the charm.
Every image made divine
In our temples is but thine.

Thou art Durga, Lady and Queen,
With her hands that strike and her
swords of sheen,
Thou art Lakshmi lotus-throned,
And the Muse a hundred-toned,
Pure and perfect without peer,
Mother lend thine ear,
Rich with thy hurrying streams,
Bright with thy orchard gleems,
Dark of hue O candid-fair

In thy soul, with jewelled hair
And thy glorious smile divine,
Lovilest of all earthly lands,
Showering wealth from well-stored hands!
Mother, mother mine!
Mother sweet, I bow to thee,
Mother great and free!

‘Vande Mataram’ is well known as the National Song of our country. In this song, the two words ‘Vande Mataram’ have achieved major importance. These are the only words that many freedom fighters remembered while being sentenced to rigorous punishments in Court or being hanged to death. Muslim organisations have objected to this song. They opine that it is against the ‘Shariyat’. In this country, whether something is right or wrong is determined on the basis of the Indian Constitution. Yet Muslims are demanding total elimination of ‘Vande Mataram’ on the basis of the ‘Shariyat’ law.

Poetry collection By Shivmangal Singh 'Suman'.

आभार

जिस-जिस से पथ पर स्नेह मिला, उस-उस राही को धन्यवाद।

जीवन अस्थिर अनजाने ही, हो जाता पथ पर मेल कहीं,
सीमित पग डग, लम्बी मंज़िल, तय कर लेना कुछ खेल नहीं।
दाएँ-बाएँ सुख-दुख चलते, सम्मुख चलता पथ का प्रसाद –
जिस-जिस से पथ पर स्नेह मिला, उस-उस राही को धन्यवाद।

साँसों पर अवलम्बित काया, जब चलते-चलते चूर हुई,
दो स्नेह-शब्द मिल गये, मिली नव स्फूर्ति, थकावट दूर हुई।
पथ के पहचाने छूट गये, पर साथ-साथ चल रही याद –
जिस-जिस से पथ पर स्नेह मिला, उस-उस राही को धन्यवाद।

जो साथ न मेरा दे पाये, उनसे कब सूनी हुई डगर?
मैं भी न चलूँ यदि तो क्या, राही मर लेकिन राह अमर।
इस पथ पर वे ही चलते हैं, जो चलने का पा गये स्वाद –
जिस-जिस से पथ पर स्नेह मिला, उस-उस राही को धन्यवाद।

कैसे चल पाता यदि न मिला होता मुझको आकुल अंतर?
कैसे चल पाता यदि मिलते, चिर-तृप्ति अमरता-पूर्ण प्रहर!
आभारी हूँ मैं उन सबका, दे गये व्यथा का जो प्रसाद –
जिस-जिस से पथ पर स्नेह मिला, उस-उस राही को धन्यवाद।

चलना हमारा काम है

गति प्रबल पैरों में भरी
फिर क्यों रहूं दर दर खडा
जब आज मेरे सामने
है रास्ता इतना पडा
जब तक न मंजिल पा सकूँ,
तब तक मुझे न विराम है,
चलना हमारा काम है ।

कुछ कह लिया, कुछ सुन लिया
कुछ बोझ अपना बँट गया
अच्छा हुआ, तुम मिल गई
कुछ रास्ता ही कट गया
क्या राह में परिचय कहूँ,
राही हमारा नाम है,
चलना हमारा काम है ।

जीवन अपूर्ण लिए हुए
पाता कभी खोता कभी
आशा निराशा से घिरा,
हँसता कभी रोता कभी
गति-मति न हो अवरूद्ध,
इसका ध्यान आठो याम है,
चलना हमारा काम है ।

इस विशद विश्व-प्रहार में
किसको नहीं बहना पडा
सुख-दुख हमारी ही तरह,
किसको नहीं सहना पडा
फिर व्यर्थ क्यों कहता फिरूँ,
मुझ पर विधाता वाम है,
चलना हमारा काम है ।

मैं पूर्णता की खोज में
दर-दर भटकता ही रहा
प्रत्येक पग पर कुछ न कुछ
रोडा अटकता ही रहा
निराशा क्यों मुझे?
जीवन इसी का नाम है,
चलना हमारा काम है ।

साथ में चलते रहे
कुछ बीच ही से फिर गए
गति न जीवन की रूकी
जो गिर गए सो गिर गए
रहे हर दम,
उसी की सफलता अभिराम है,
चलना हमारा काम है ।

फकत यह जानता
जो मिट गया वह जी गया
मूंदकर पलकें सहज
दो घूँट हँसकर पी गया
सुधा-मिक्ष्रित गरल,
वह साकिया का जाम है,
चलना हमारा काम है ।

Poetry Collection By Ramdhari Singh 'Dinkar'.

चाँद और कवि

रात यों कहने लगा मुझसे गगन का चाँद,
आदमी भी क्या अनोखा जीव होता है!
उलझनें अपनी बनाकर आप ही फँसता,
और फिर बेचैन हो जगता, न सोता है।

जानता है तू कि मैं कितना पुराना हूँ?
मैं चुका हूँ देख मनु को जनमते-मरते
और लाखों बार तुझ-से पागलों को भी
चाँदनी में बैठ स्वप्नों पर सही करते।

आदमी का स्वप्न? है वह बुलबुला जल का
आज बनता और कल फिर फूट जाता है
किन्तु, फिर भी धन्य ठहरा आदमी ही तो?
बुलबुलों से खेलता, कविता बनाता है।

मैं न बोला किन्तु मेरी रागिनी बोली,
देख फिर से चाँद! मुझको जानता है तू?
स्वप्न मेरे बुलबुले हैं? है यही पानी?
आग को भी क्या नहीं पहचानता है तू?

मैं न वह जो स्वप्न पर केवल सही करते,
आग में उसको गला लोहा बनाता हूँ,
और उस पर नींव रखता हूँ नये घर की,
इस तरह दीवार फौलादी उठाता हूँ।

मनु नहीं, मनु-पुत्र है यह सामने, जिसकी
कल्पना की जीभ में भी धार होती है,
बाण ही होते विचारों के नहीं केवल,
स्वप्न के भी हाथ में तलवार होती है।

स्वर्ग के सम्राट को जाकर खबर कर दे-
रोज ही आकाश चढ़ते जा रहे हैं वे,
रोकिये, जैसे बने इन स्वप्नवालों को,
स्वर्ग की ही ओर बढ़ते आ रहे हैं वे।

–

लोहे के मर्द

पुरुष वीर बलवान,
देश की शान,
हमारे नौजवान
घायल होकर आये हैं।

कहते हैं, ये पुष्प, दीप,
अक्षत क्यों लाये हो?

हमें कामना नहीं सुयश-विस्तार की,
फूलों के हारों की, जय-जयकार की।

तड़प रही घायल स्वदेश की शान है।
सीमा पर संकट में हिन्दुस्तान है।

ले जाओ आरती, पुष्प, पल्लव हरे,
ले जाओ ये थाल मोदकों ले भरे।

तिलक चढ़ा मत और हृदय में हूक दो,
दे सकते हो तो गोली-बन्दूक दो।

–

Poetry collection by Harivansh Rai Bachan

जीवन की आपाधापी में

जीवन की आपाधापी में कब वक़्त मिला
कुछ देर कहीं पर बैठ कभी यह सोच सकूँ
जो किया, कहा, माना उसमें क्या बुरा भला।

जिस दिन मेरी चेतना जगी मैंने देखा
मैं खड़ा हुआ हूँ इस दुनिया के मेले में,
हर एक यहाँ पर एक भुलाने में भूला
हर एक लगा है अपनी अपनी दे-ले में
कुछ देर रहा हक्का-बक्का, भौचक्का-सा,
आ गया कहाँ, क्या करूँ यहाँ, जाऊँ किस जा?
फिर एक तरफ से आया ही तो धक्का-सा
मैंने भी बहना शुरू किया उस रेले में,
क्या बाहर की ठेला-पेली ही कुछ कम थी,
जो भीतर भी भावों का ऊहापोह मचा,
जो किया, उसी को करने की मजबूरी थी,
जो कहा, वही मन के अंदर से उबल चला,
जीवन की आपाधापी में कब वक़्त मिला
कुछ देर कहीं पर बैठ कभी यह सोच सकूँ
जो किया, कहा, माना उसमें क्या बुरा भला।

मेला जितना भड़कीला रंग-रंगीला था,
मानस के अन्दर उतनी ही कमज़ोरी थी,
जितना ज़्यादा संचित करने की ख़्वाहिश थी,
उतनी ही छोटी अपने कर की झोरी थी,
जितनी ही बिरमे रहने की थी अभिलाषा,
उतना ही रेले तेज ढकेले जाते थे,
क्रय-विक्रय तो ठण्ढे दिल से हो सकता है,
यह तो भागा-भागी की छीना-छोरी थी;
अब मुझसे पूछा जाता है क्या बतलाऊँ
क्या मान अकिंचन बिखराता पथ पर आया,
वह कौन रतन अनमोल मिला ऐसा मुझको,
जिस पर अपना मन प्राण निछावर कर आया,
यह थी तकदीरी बात मुझे गुण दोष न दो
जिसको समझा था सोना, वह मिट्टी निकली,
जिसको समझा था आँसू, वह मोती निकला।
जीवन की आपाधापी में कब वक़्त मिला
कुछ देर कहीं पर बैठ कभी यह सोच सकूँ
जो किया, कहा, माना उसमें क्या बुरा भला।

मैं कितना ही भूलूँ, भटकूँ या भरमाऊँ,
है एक कहीं मंज़िल जो मुझे बुलाती है,
कितने ही मेरे पाँव पड़े ऊँचे-नीचे,
प्रतिपल वह मेरे पास चली ही आती है,
मुझ पर विधि का आभार बहुत-सी बातों का।
पर मैं कृतज्ञ उसका इस पर सबसे ज़्यादा -
नभ ओले बरसाए, धरती शोले उगले,
अनवरत समय की चक्की चलती जाती है,
मैं जहाँ खड़ा था कल उस थल पर आज नहीं,
कल इसी जगह पर पाना मुझको मुश्किल है,
ले मापदंड जिसको परिवर्तित कर देतीं
केवल छूकर ही देश-काल की सीमाएँ
जग दे मुझपर फैसला उसे जैसा भाए
लेकिन मैं तो बेरोक सफ़र में जीवन के
इस एक और पहलू से होकर निकल चला।
जीवन की आपाधापी में कब वक़्त मिला
कुछ देर कहीं पर बैठ कभी यह सोच सकूँ
जो किया, कहा, माना उसमें क्या बुरा भला।

था तुम्हें मैंने रुलाया!

हा, तुम्हारी मृदुल इच्छा!
हाय, मेरी कटु अनिच्छा!
था बहुत माँगा ना तुमने किन्तु वह भी दे ना पाया!
था तुम्हें मैंने रुलाया!

स्नेह का वह कण तरल था,
मधु न था, न सुधा-गरल था,
एक क्षण को भी, सरलते, क्यों समझ तुमको न पाया!
था तुम्हें मैंने रुलाया!

बूँद कल की आज सागर,
सोचता हूँ बैठ तट पर -
क्यों अभी तक डूब इसमें कर न अपना अंत पाया!
था तुम्हें मैंने रुलाया!

-

क्षण भर को क्यों प्यार किया था?

अर्द्ध रात्रि में सहसा उठकर,
पलक संपुटों में मदिरा भर,
तुमने क्यों मेरे चरणों में अपना तन-मन वार दिया था?
क्षण भर को क्यों प्यार किया था?

‘यह अधिकार कहाँ से लाया!’
और न कुछ मैं कहने पाया -
मेरे अधरों पर निज अधरों का तुमने रख भार दिया था!
क्षण भर को क्यों प्यार किया था?

वह क्षण अमर हुआ जीवन में,
आज राग जो उठता मन में -
यह प्रतिध्वनि उसकी जो उर में तुमने भर उद्गार दिया था!
क्षण भर को क्यों प्यार किया था?

पंथ की पहचान

पूर्व चलने के बटोही बाट की पहचान कर ले।

पुस्तकों में है नहीं
छापी गई इसकी कहानी
हाल इसका ज्ञात होता
है न औरों की जबानी

अनगिनत राही गए
इस राह से उनका पता क्या
पर गए कुछ लोग इस पर
छोड़ पैरों की निशानी

यह निशानी मूक होकर
भी बहुत कुछ बोलती है
खोल इसका अर्थ पंथी
पंथ का अनुमान कर ले।

पूर्व चलने के बटोही बाट की पहचान कर ले।

यह बुरा है या कि अच्छा
व्यर्थ दिन इस पर बिताना
अब असंभव छोड़ यह पथ
दूसरे पर पग बढ़ाना

तू इसे अच्छा समझ
यात्रा सरल इससे बनेगी
सोच मत केवल तुझे ही
यह पड़ा मन में बिठाना

हर सफल पंथी यही
विश्वास ले इस पर बढ़ा है
तू इसी पर आज अपने
चित्त का अवधान कर ले।

पूर्व चलने के बटोही बाट की पहचान कर ले।

है अनिश्चित किस जगह पर
सरित गिरि गह्वर मिलेंगे
है अनिश्चित किस जगह पर
बाग वन सुंदर मिलेंगे

किस जगह यात्रा खतम हो
जाएगी यह भी अनिश्चित
है अनिश्चित कब सुमन कब
कंटकों के शर मिलेंगे

कौन सहसा छू जाएँगे
मिलेंगे कौन सहसा
आ पड़े कुछ भी रुकेगा
तू न ऐसी आन कर ले।

पूर्व चलने के बटोही बाट की पहचान कर ले।

किस कर में यह वीणा धर दूँ?

देवों ने था जिसे बनाया,
देवों ने था जिसे बजाया,
मानव के हाथों में कैसे इसको आज समर्पित कर दूँ?
किस कर में यह वीणा धर दूँ?

इसने स्वर्ग रिझाना सीखा,
स्वर्गिक तान सुनाना सीखा,
जगती को खुश करनेवाले स्वर से कैसे इसको भर दूँ?
किस कर में यह वीणा धर दूँ?

क्यों बाकी अभिलाषा मन में,
झंकृत हो यह फिर जीवन में?
क्यों न हृदय निर्मम हो कहता अंगारे अब धर इस पर दूँ?
किस कर में यह वीणा धर दूँ?

–

साथी, सब कुछ सहना होगा!

मानव पर जगती का शासन,
जगती पर संसृति का बंधन,
संसृति को भी और किसी के प्रतिबंधों में रहना होगा!
साथी, सब कुछ सहना होगा!

हम क्या हैं जगती के सर में!
जगती क्या, संसृति सागर में!
एक प्रबल धारा में हमको लघु तिनके-सा बहना होगा!
साथी, सब कुछ सहना होगा!

आओ, अपनी लघुता जानें,
अपनी निर्बलता पहचानें,
जैसे जग रहता आया है उसी तरह से रहना होगा!
साथी, सब कुछ सहना होगा!

–

दिन जल्दी-जल्दी ढलता है!

हो जाय न पथ में रात कहीं,
मंज़िल भी तो है दूर नहीं -
यह सोच थका दिन का पंथी भी जल्दी-जल्दी चलता है!
दिन जल्दी-जल्दी ढलता है!

बच्चे प्रत्याशा में होंगे,
नीड़ों से झाँक रहे होंगे -
यह ध्यान परों में चिड़ियों के भरता कितनी चंचलता है!
दिन जल्दी-जल्दी ढलता है!

मुझसे मिलने को कौन विकल?
मैं होऊँ किसके हित चंचल? -
यह प्रश्न शिथिल करता पद को, भरता उर में विह्वलता है!
दिन जल्दी-जल्दी ढलता है!

मधुबाला

1

मैं मधुबाला मधुशाला की,
मैं मधुशाला की मधुबाला!
मैं मधु-विक्रेता को प्यारी,
मधु के धट मुझपर बलिहारी,
प्यालों की मैं सुषमा सारी,
मेरा रुख देखा करती है
मधु-प्यासे नयनों की माला।
मैं मधुशाला की मधुबाला!

2

इस नीले अंचल की छाया
में जग-ज्वाला का झुलसाया
आकर शीतल करता काया,
मधु-मरहम का मैं लेपन कर
अच्छा करती उर का छाला।
मैं मधुशाला की मधुबाला!

3

मधुघट ले जब करती नर्तन,
मेरे नूपुर के छम-छनन
में लय होता जग का क्रंदन,
झूमा करता मानव जीवन
का क्षण-क्षण बनकर मतवाला।
मैं मधुशाला की मधुबाला!

4

मैं इस आँगन की आकर्षण,
मधु से सिंचित मेरी चितवन,
मेरी वाणी में मधु के कण,
मदमत्त बनाया मैं करती,
यश लूटा करती मधुशाला।
मैं मधुशाला की मधुबाला!

5

था एक समय, थी मधुशाला,
था मिट्टी का घट, था प्याला,
थी, किन्तु, नहीं साकीबाला,
था बैठा ठाला विक्रेता
दे बंद कपाटों पर ताला।
मैं मधुशाला की मधुबाला!

6

तब इस घर में था तम छाया,
था भय छाया, था भ्रम छाया,
था मातम छाया, गम छाया,
ऊषा का दीप लिए सर पर,
मैं आई करती उजियाला।
मैं मधुशाला की मधुबाला!

7

सोने की मधुशाना चमकी,
माणित द्युति से मदिरा दमकी,
मधुगंध दिशाओं में चमकी,
चल पड़ा लिए कर में प्याला
प्रत्येक सुरा पीनेवाला।
मैं मधुशाला की मधुबाला!

8

थे मदिरा के मृत-मूक घड़े,
थे मूर्ति सदृश मधुपात्र खड़े,
थे जड़वत् प्याले भूमि पड़े,
जादू के हाथों से छूकर
मैंने इनमें जीवन डाला।
मैं मधुशाला की मधुबाला!

9

मुझको छूकर मधुघट छलके,
प्याले मधु पीने को ललके ,
मालिक जागा मलकर पलकें,
अँगड़ाई लेकर उठ बैठी
चिर सुप्त विमूर्च्छित मधुशाला।
मैं मधुशाला की मधुबाला!

10

प्यासे आए, मैंने आँका,
वातायन से मैंने झाँका,
पीनेवालों का दल बाँका,
उत्कंठित स्वर से बोल उठा,
‘कर दे पागल, भर दे प्याला!’
मैं मधुशाला की मधुबाला!

11

खुल द्वार गए मदिरालय के,
नारे लगते मेरी जय के,
मिट चिह्न गए चिंता भय के,
हर ओर मचा है शोर यही,
‘ला-ला मदिरा ला-ला’!,
मैं मधुशाला की मधुबाला!

12

हर एक तृप्ति का दास यहाँ,
पर एक बात है खास यहाँ,
पीने से बढ़ती प्यास यहाँ,
सौभाग्य मगर मेरा देखो,
देने से बढ़ती है हाला!
मैं मधुशाला की मधुबाला!

13

चाहे जितना मैं दूँ हाला,
चाहे जितना तू पी प्याला,
चाहे जितना बन मतवाला,
सुन, भेद बताती हूँ अन्तिम,
यह शांत नही होगी ज्वाला।
मैं मधुशाला की मधुबाला!

14

मधु कौन यहाँ पीने आता,
है किसका प्यालों से नाता,
जग देख मुझे है मदमाता,
जिसके चिर तंद्रिल नयनों पर
तनती मैं स्वप्नों का जाला।
मैं मधुशाला की मधुबाला!

15

यह स्वप्न-विनिर्मित मधुशाला,
यह स्वप्न रचित मधु का प्याला,
स्वप्निल तृष्णा, स्वप्निल हाला,
स्वप्नों की दुनिया में भूला
फिरता मानव भोलाभाला।
मैं मधुशाला की मधुबाला!

My Favrate Hindi Poetry Collection

Lohe Ke ped Hare Honge


Lohe ke ped hare honge, tu gaan prem ka gaata chal
nam hogi yeh mitti zaroor, aanso ke kan barsaataa chal.

Siskiyon aur chitkaaron se, jitna bhi ho akaash bhara,
Kankaalon ka ho dher, khapparon se chahe ho pati dhara.
aasha ke swar ka bhaar, pavan ko leking lena hi hoga,
jeevit sapno ke liye marg murdon ko dena hi hoga.
rango ke saaton ghat udhel, yeh andhiyaari rang jaayegi
Usha ko satya banane ko jaavak nabh par chitraata chal.

Aadarshon se Aadarsha bhide, pragya pragya par toot rahi,
Pratima Pratima se ladti hai, dharti ki kismat foot rahi.
Aavarton ka hai visham jaal, nirupaay buddhi chakraati hai,
vigyaan - yaan ar chadhi hui sabhyata doobne jaati hai.
Jab-Jab mastishq jayi hota, sansaar gyaan se chalta hai,
sheetalta ki hai shah hriday, tu yeh samvaad sunaata chal.

Sooraj hai jag ka bujha bujha, chandramaa amlin sa lagta hai,
Sab ki koshish bekaar hui, aalok na inka jagta hai.
In malin grahon ke praron mein koi naveed aabha bhar de,
Jaadogar! apne darpan par ghiskar in ko taaza kar de.
Deepak ke Jalte Praan, diwali tabhi suhaawan hoti hai,
Roshni jagat ko dene ko, apni asthiyaan jalaata chal.

Kya unhe dekh vismit hona, jo hain almast bahaaron mein,
phoolon ko jo hain goonth rahe, sone- chaandi ke taaron mein.
Maanavta ka tu vipra, gandh-chaaya ka aadi pujaari hai,
Vedna-putra! to to keval jalne bhar ka adhikaari hai.
Le badi kushi se utha, sarovar mein jo hansta chaand mile,
Darpan mein rachkar phool, magar uska bhi mol chukata chal.

Kaayaa ki kitni dhoom-dhaam! do roz chamak bujh jaati hai,
chaaya peeti piyuush, mrityu ke upar dhwaja udhati hai.
Lene de jag ko use, taal par jo kalhans machalta hai,
tera maraal jal ke darpan mein neeche-neeche chalta hai.
Kankaabh dhool jhar aayegi, ye rang kabhi ud jaayenge,
Saurabh hai keval saar, use tu sab ke liye jugaata chal.

Kya apni un se hod, amar-ta ki jinko pehchaan nahin,
chaaya se parichay nahi, gandh ke jag ka jin ko gyaan nahi?
Jo chatur chaand ka ras nichod pyaalon mein dhaalaa karte hain,
Bhattiyaan chadaakar phoolon se jo itra nikaala karte hain.
Ye bhi jaayenge kabhi, magar, aadhi manushyata-waalon par,
Jaise muskaata aaya hai, vaise ab bhi muskaata chal.

Sabhyata-ang par shat karaal, yeh arth-maanvon ka bal hai,
hum ro-kar bharte use, humaari aankh mein ganga-jal hai.
Sooli par chadha maseeha ko ve foole nahi samaate hain,
Hum shav ko jeevit karne ko chaayapur mein le jaate hain.
Bheegi chandniyon mein jeeta, jo kathin dhoop mein marta hai,
Ujiyaali se peedit nar ke man mein gaudhooli basaaata chal.

Yeh dekh nai leela un ki, phir us ne bada kamaal kiya,
Gandhi ke lahu se saare, bhaarat-sansaar ko laal kiya.
Jee Uthe raam, Jee Uthe Krishna, bharat ki mitti roti hai,
Kya hua ki pyaare Gandhi ki yeh laash na jinda hoti hai?
Talwaar maarti jinhe, baansuri unhe naya jeevan deti,
Jeevani-shakti ke abhimaani! yeh bhi kamaal dikhlaata chal.

Dharti ke bhaag hare honge, bhaarti Amrit barsaayegi,
din ki karaal dahakta par, chaandni susheetal chaayegi.
Jwaalamukhiyon ke kantho mein kal-kanthi ka aasan hoga
Jildon se lada gagan hoga, phoolon se bhara bhuvan hoga.
Bejaan yantra vichrit, Goongi Moortiyaan ek din bolengi,
Moonh khol khol sab ke bheetar shilpi! tu jeebh bithaata chal.

Lohe ke ped hare honge...

New Collections..Doha

yon Naino Mein Putli, Tyon Maalik Ghat Mahin
Moorakh Log Na Janhin, Baahar Dhudhan Jahin

Translation

Like the pupil in the eyes
The Lord resides inside
Ignorant do not know this fact
They search Him outside

My Understanding

In this Doha, Kabir using a very apt simile demonstrates the fact that God is within everyone. The wise thus realize Him by introspection, while the ignorant search Him externally.
God is unseen and inexpressible. Anything that is seen, can be counted or measured, automatically becomes mutable. But God is not mutable.

We can see a bunch of flowers, count them, weigh them, but how can we see, count or weigh the fragrance? Same way, the Atman of the Hindu, the soul of the Christians is that representation of God that resides within everyone and is yet unseen, unknown, incomprehensible and inexpressible.

My Fav dohas..collection..in Hindi

माटी कहे कुम्हार से, तु क्या रौंदे मोय ।
एक दिन ऐसा आएगा, मैं रौंदूगी तोय ॥

माला फेरत जुग भया, फिरा न मन का फेर ।
कर का मन का डार दे, मन का मनका फेर ॥

तिनका कबहुँ ना निंदये, जो पाँव तले होय ।
कबहुँ उड़ आँखो पड़े, पीर घानेरी होय ॥

गुरु गोविंद दोनों खड़े, काके लागूं पाँय ।
बलिहारी गुरु आपनो, गोविंद दियो मिलाय ॥

सुख मे सुमिरन ना किया, दु:ख में करते याद ।
कह कबीर ता दास की, कौन सुने फरियाद ॥

साईं इतना दीजिये, जा मे कुटुम समाय ।
मैं भी भूखा न रहूँ, साधु ना भूखा जाय ॥

धीरे-धीरे रे मना, धीरे सब कुछ होय ।
माली सींचे सौ घड़ा, ॠतु आए फल होय ॥

कबीरा ते नर अँध है, गुरु को कहते और ।
हरि रूठे गुरु ठौर है, गुरु रूठे नहीं ठौर ॥

माया मरी न मन मरा, मर-मर गए शरीर ।
आशा तृष्णा न मरी, कह गए दास कबीर ॥

रात गंवाई सोय के, दिवस गंवाया खाय ।
हीरा जन्म अमोल था, कोड़ी बदले जाय ॥

दुःख में सुमिरन सब करे सुख में करै न कोय।
जो सुख में सुमिरन करे दुःख काहे को होय ॥

बडा हुआ तो क्या हुआ जैसे पेड़ खजूर।
पंथी को छाया नही फल लागे अति दूर ॥

साधु ऐसा चाहिए जैसा सूप सुभाय।
सार-सार को गहि रहै थोथा देई उडाय॥

साँई इतना दीजिए जामें कुटुंब समाय ।
मैं भी भूखा ना रहूँ साधु न भुखा जाय॥

जो तोको काँटा बुवै ताहि बोव तू फूल।
तोहि फूल को फूल है वाको है तिरसुल॥

उठा बगुला प्रेम का तिनका चढ़ा अकास।
तिनका तिनके से मिला तिन का तिन के पास॥

सात समंदर की मसि करौं लेखनि सब बनराइ।
धरती सब कागद करौं हरि गुण लिखा न जाइ॥

साधू गाँठ न बाँधई उदर समाता लेय।
आगे पाछे हरी खड़े जब माँगे तब देय॥

Have men lost their propensity to love?

It’s been sometime now that the mind’s harboring a few restless ruminations that seeks searching answers. These questions have been piling up within the innards of the soul for a long time now.

It was a chance conversation with a web developer friend who doubles up as a sex educator that brings the dormant subject to the forefront of the medulla oblongata.
Does a man fall in love with his women the same way, as the women love’s her man?
My enlightened friend informs…there’s nothing called “love” in a man’s dictionary. If a man says he loves you...he’s lying! What a women interprets as love is a man’s sexual desire to mate with her that drives him to play the mating game of wooing, emoting, sharing & caring.
*Crash* that was my heart breaking into a thousand pieces! This piece of gyan is not very flattering to a women’s already fragile nerves. I sulk about wasting precious time in my search for something that was never there.

Remorse hits me with a suitably high degree of contriteness. The man of my dreams doesn’t exist? *Sheds a few tears* with an in between *sigh* of defeat!
Further searching questions about what’s important to a man & a women in terms of relationships plop up to rub in more misery.
The women juggles her various roles in the capacity of a wife, a lover and a mother. She’s committed to each one of these roles with equal dedication, love & commitment. Her intensity in loving her man & her child equally, does not dwindle.
So she’s given due recognition as a more evolved species. That’s it? Is this enough? Just to put them on a pedestal & announce that they are better equipped to handle nature’s complexities?
The relationship between a child & its mother is a complex one with the intertwining of their bodies & soul. The culmination of life inside her is nature’s generous gift to a woman. It brings out in her an embodiment of personified traits bordering between tenderness & love. Yet when it comes to loving, she would give equal or sometimes more importance to her husband over her child.
Does the man feel the same way? Most men don’t. A close writer friend points out that a man is not capable of loving his women the way he loves his kids. The selfless love for a woman is a figment of our romantic imagination. It’s just not possible to love women the same way.
The kids are more important coz they are an extension of his very own self. A man is a proud individual & he takes pride in his capacity to produce his own offspring. He feels a sense of responsibility towards his kids & with that comes a bonding that he can never experience with his women. *More sulks*
By this time confusion is blocking the tiniest ray of hope that there is HOPE! So I press on & ask a few more men on their opinions about who is more important to them in their lives…their wife or their kids. The response is 50/50.
I must mention here that I do have a bag full of wonderful intelligent single men friends & took pride a while ago in the way these great individuals exhibited strength in character by showing their responsibility towards their kids. Such display of genuine integrity was very endearing indeed.
But over the years what I notice is a very unhealthy trend of over indulgence. So to get a deeper perspective, I segregate the driven, self-obsessed fathers from there lesser counterparts. What is different in their lifestyles that make some excessively preoccupied in their fatherhood status & others manage a more healthy balance in comparison. How are they different than the regular dad’s who love their kids from the bottom of their hearts & yet don’t look completely possessed in doing so?
Magnify the situation & one notices that these men/dad’s are those who are not in a steady loving relationship with there spouses / partners. The emotional bonding present within a family has been long lost or was never there.
In the absence of such a relationship, the feeling of void is replaced with an intense connection with their children & therefore hold on to that part of connection quite niggardly. Nothing is more important! Period!
So what about those men who are in happy marriages & stable relationships? Are they less loving fathers? Most of the men in this category choose their wife over the kids. In fact, my bro didn’t waste a breath before answering the question & reacts incredulously that “the man who chooses his kid over his wife is a myopic b*****d”. In a normal situation, I would shun such profanity & yet this is like balm today! So all is not lost! phew!
As I look for more comforting answers, another matured individual who’s experienced life along with a huge dollop of drama with its three dimensional effects, points out that a man is capable of loving a women deeply. This it seems is a proven fact in the medical journals too. Why else, when faced with a life/death situation during childbirth does a husband favor to save his wife instead of the child in 99% of the cases.
The disturbing thoughts persist nevertheless. As a woman, I feel cheated when I come across men who have such a self-centered approach to life. Our kids are important to us. There is never a passing moment when I do not think of my child’s well being. But being a mother has not made me loose perspective of my otherrelationships & wants.
Life is not just about raising kids, being a mother & over-looking the other important components that lead to a salubrious & purposeful existence. I’m capable of loving my child & yet would not water down my love for my partner who would be equally important to me.
In comparison to this…the men I come across are completely lost individuals. They ache for love & caring from their female interests but are not open to build-up the same emotions themselves. It’s tiresome to see men with such great potential lose perspective of life. As if the malaise has set in with no effective remedial treatment in sight. How does one deal with such maladjustment? Have the men lost their propensity to love?

....Writen by BuntysBanter